Matthew 19:3-9- "Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said,"For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh"? "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."
Marriage is a covenant before God where vows are shared. God holds a covenant as a non-breakable agreement.
Psalms 105:8- He has remembered His covenant forever, The word He commanded to a thousand generations. (God's covenants are forever, just as marriage is till death do us part.)
Any covenant-including the marriage covenant-is a binding, weighty, obligation. In Proverbs 20:25 we read, "It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows".
Another reason God hates divorce is because it tears at the very heart of God's redemptive plan for the world. One of his major purposes for marriage is to mirror his image. After he had created everything He said "Let us create man in Our image, according to Our likeness". What does it mean to mirror God's image? Our marriage should exalt God and glorify him to a world that desperately needs to see Him. This is why we were created in his image so that people who wouldn't otherwise know what God is like, can look thru us and get a glimpse of Him.
The second purpose is to complete each other and experience companionship. Genesis 2:18 says "It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him".
The third purpose is to multiply a godly legacy. God's original plan for the home was a place children could grow up to learn character, values, and integrity. Deuteronomy 6:6-7- "These words, which I am commanding you, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and daughters, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up."
This is why marriage is far more important than most people realize. It affects God's reputation here on earth. This is why Christ must be the Builder of your home.
Unfortunately people who base their lives on worldly desires tear apart this plan for marriage. So there are "exception clauses" that allow for divorce.
Matthew 19:9- " I say to you, whoever divorces their spouse, except for immorality, and marries another commits adultery."
1 Corinthians 7:15-17- "Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let them leave; the man or woman is not
under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife? Only, as the Lord has assigned to each one, as God has called each, in this manner let them walk. And so I direct in all the churches."
However you choose to interpret these passages, one thing is for sure; God never ordained or created divorce, man did.
God releases a couple from the lifelong covenant of marriage:
1. In the case of consistent, unrepentant immorality.
2. When an unbelieving spouse deserts a believer.
1 Corinthians 7:24- "Each man must remain in that condition in which he was called...Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be released."
Obviously this is a difficult issue. But both sides of the debate would agree that most couples seeking a divorce today do so for unbiblical reasons. Whether it's poor communication, incompatibility, financial problems, lack of commitment to the relationship, or changes in priorities. In short, when the marriage isn't working, the common solution is to get out.
In today's culture where meeting individual needs no matter the cost, so as to gain pleasure and avoid pain; we have to be open to trusting God's plan to come to pass in our marriage. God's plan is one of redemption. And very few spouses who consider divorce have done everything they can to salvage the marriage.
Your probably saying, "Well you don't understand my spouse and my situation." And your right, I don't. But with the seriousness of the subject let me state a few points:
1. You need someone who is willing and able to talk to you during this time( Someone who won't just sympathize but will hold you accountable to look at biblical issues.)
2. You need to be surrounded by other Christians that can love and encourage you.
3. Most important you need to seek God in his word and cry out to Him to know His will for what you should do, and of how to respond to your spouse.
How much value are you going to place on the vows you said to your spouse before the face of God?
When you consider the value God puts on a covenant, what are the obligations of your marriage covenant before Him?
Will you be patient to wait for God to work in your marriage, and give you the wisdom, resources, and encouragement to do what you can't imagine?
I encourage you to ask God what you can do to rebuild your marriage. He specializes in redeeming the unredeemable. This is His main desire for your marriage.
I encourage you and your spouse to begin to pray this prayer:
Change me, Lord. Here is my heart. Cleanse me of impure motives. Reduce me to love. Let your pure love be the driving force behind my words, my touch, and my tone of voice.
Change my perception. Help me to see myself and my spouse through your eyes. Reveal to us where we are making the situation worse by resisting Your leadership and disobeying Your commands.
Help me to wait prayerfully and expectantly for You to move in us and our circumstances.
May You Be Blessed with Peace and Understanding!
True Change Ministries
